Burn A Qur'an Day: How We As A Community Should React

I'm sure you've all heard of the Pastor Terry Jones threatening to wreak havoc on the entire world by burning around 200 copies of the Quran on the anniversary of 9/11. Yes, he came out and said he would never do something like that again alhamdulilah , but Allahua’lam where this ends up.

When you hear of someone wanting to do something that inflammatory....something so blasphemous and despicable, it's natural to feel angry. Reallyyy angry. This is the QURAN we're taking about. The book of Allah (SWT). I mean, how could someone leading a congregation of a place named "Dove 'peace' Church" do something that hurtful...and just plain wrong?

But the trick is, how to do we deal with this anger? On my recent drive back to Tampa, I had a lot of time to think about my last few weeks in Gainesville and how the Muslim community there has been reacting to all this controversy. The world's eyes would be looking and critically evaluating our every move. As someone who’s worked in the media from the inside and knows what damage they can do if we even made one mistake, I can tell you, it's a creepy thought.

SubhanAllah, guys. This tiny Muslim community has so much to teach our broken Muslim ummah. And if we cared to learn, one could only imagine how far a few simple lessons could take us.

It could all really be summed up into one short sentence:

Practice what you preach.

Let me elaborate more about what I mean exactly.... Here we go:

One of the first things that crosses our minds when we hear of something going on that we don't agree with that we want to speak out against is, "Where are the picket signs? We need to plan a protest for this thing!"

But have you ever just stepped back for a second and wondered how effective you were really being? Sure, you might have let go of some steam you were bottling up inside. There'll probably be a 30 second spot about it on the evening news. Then what? Business as usual and people go about their lives like nothing ever happened. End of story.

Want to know something that surprised me while I was there? Not a single protest about this issue. By the Muslims at least...I know the International Club for the Resurgence of the Socialist Party was planning a few lol.

What did they do instead? Exactly what Islam teaches us to do. A particular ayah from the Qur'an comes to mind:

"And not alike are the good and the evil. Repel (evil) with what is best , when lo! he between whom and you was enmity would be as if he were a warm friend....And none are made to receive it but those who are patient, and none are made to receive it but those who have a mighty fortune" (Surat Fussilat: 34,35)

It's easy to become provoked in tense times like these. But is letting your emotions get the best of you going to help the situation? You can yell at the top of your lungs saying that those maniacs committing brutal acts in Allah's (swt) name aren't practicing Islam the way it was meant to be practiced, but when all is said and done, your words will fall on deaf ears. Because they're just that: words.

"....Repel (the evil) with what is best, when lo! he between whom and you was enmity would be as if he were a warm friend"

I saw that particular part of the ayah in action. The community made a pact when this all started to become part of the national spotlight that they would NOT plan demonstrations. Instead, they would use all their time and energy to start something called the Gainesville Muslim Initiative, a series of planned events targeted at letting the community get to know their Muslim neighbors and teach them what Islam is really about. It also involves encouraging Muslims to get more involved in their community as a whole.

You could almost see the transformation happening in front of you. People would randomly stop to tell you that they’re 'in solidarity' with the Muslim community and asking if there was any way they could help. Professors would stop class just to condemn the Pastor's actions. Questions about Islam were flooding the IOC (the UF version of MSA). A movement was begun.

The ball is on our court everyone. We're on fourth down in the in-zone. Top of the ninth inning.Stoppage time on the field. I don't know what the sport reference you prefer is , but I hope you get the idea. We cannot afford to waste any more time. What can YOU do?

If you see trash on the street when walking to class, pick it up...cleanliness is half our faith after all. Smile while dealing with people...it's charity. Ask about your neighbors, they have a right on us. When a friend doesn't show up to class, ask if they're okay. Start up a conversation with the person behind you while standing in line at Publix. If you see a janitor cleaning up a public restroom, let them know that you appreciate their services. Open the door for the person behind you. If an older person enters the room, offer them your seat. Be kind and understanding to the disabled. Say 'thank you' when someone does something nice for you. Do you catch my drift...?

None of these is essentially life altering. They all have to do with how we deal with the people we interact with every day. The best dawah we can do is the kind we do unconsciously...it makes us better people and doesn't make others feel like we’re preaching to them. SubhanAllah, Islam first spread across the Middle East and Asia when people started to notice the conduct of Muslim traders who visited their region. Their honesty and politeness were uncommon, and the more they learned, the more interested they became.

Abu Hurairah (May Allah be pleased with him) reported: A bedouin urinated in the mosque and some people rushed to beat him up. The Prophet (PBUH) said: "Leave him alone and pour a bucket of water over it. You have been sent to make things easy and not to make them difficult.'' [Al-Bukhari].

The best way to get people to understand Islam is to lead by EXAMPLE. Only once we as Muslims start fully embracing Islam into our lives do we have any chance of showing others that their assumptions are wrong. Actions speak much louder than words, my friends. People are more likely to listen if you SHOW rather than TELL. Okay, I'm gonna stop with the clichés...

Don't get me wrong...I know it isn't easy being a young Muslim in this country. Pressure to give into the social norms is suffocating. Temptations are everywhere. Falling into the hole of disobedience to Allah (swt) is becoming easier by the day...

But remember, the more difficult times become, the more good deeds we get for adhering to Allah's commands. We need to be in a constant state of self re-evaluation to correct ourselves whenever we go astray, and to make sure that when we are on the right path inshaAllah, we're on it for all the right reasons.

Something from the book Agenda to Change Our Condition is ingrained in my mind: "Struggle with the self is the means by which we purify our hearts of false deities. It is the ancient way of the Prophets. It is to walk towards a realized state of submission to the will of Allah."

The battle with ourselves and our desires will never be over. But may Allah (swt) make it easy on us and make us fit to deliver His message. Ameen.

Don't forget...make dua'a for you, make dua'a for me, make dua'a for our parents, make dua'a for our teachers, make dua'a for our scholars, make dua'a for peace, make dua'a for the victims of world hunger, make dua'a for the ummah and just keep making dua'a for everything and anyone that may need it! We could all use the power of Allah’s (swt) Mercy in our lives.

Anything I said was meant to be first and foremost a reminder to myself before anyone else. Feel free to share your own thoughts as well :) Jazakum Allahu khair for reading.

Take care,

Sarah Kassem

University of Florida

Muslim Youth for Truth Co-Founder

PS: A dua'a the Prophet used to say every morning...let's make it a goal for us to say it too inshaAllah:

Allahumainny Aa3uthu bika min al-ham walhazen, wal 3ajl walkasal, waljubn wal bukhol, wa a3uthubika min ghalabet al- daynwakahr al-reejal.

O Allah, I seek refuge from you from grief and anxiety, impotence and indolence, cowardice and greed, and from being overcome by debt and overpowered by men.

A Penny For Your Thoughts: My Reflections—And Hopefully Yours—On The Words of Allah

SubhanAllah, Ramadan has come and gone once again, for the 20th time in my life. It’s actually kind of hard to comprehend. Twenty years of blessed life—at least eight of which I was conscious of my thoughts and actions, at least to some extent (as if I wield more wisdom now or something)—and I really can’t claim to be confident in being questioned about their contents. I’ve been given—unlike so many others—the chance to win Allah’s Mercy over and over again, but have I capitalized on that opportunity? Did I strive to ensure that my sins were forgiven every time I witnessed this blessed month? Or did I win myself a place among those whom our Prophet (sal Allahu alaihi wa sallam) said are cursed—the ones upon whom Ramadan enters and exits, but who do not receive its blessing?

I find myself scared to face these questions as I type them—but I find solace in Allah’s promise of Mercy. As Imam Ash-Shafi’ee once said, “When my heart was hardened, and my courses constrained; I made my hope a stairway to Your forgiveness. My sins burdened me heavily, but when I measured it by Your forgiveness, Lord, Your forgiveness was the greater.” But since I can guarantee that Imam Ash-Shafi’ee’s shortcomings pale in comparison to mine, I think I might need a little more reassurance. 

Here, I’d like to make mention of one of Allah’s ultimate favors upon us: In these last ten days of Ramadan, Allah promises to save his devout servants from the torments of the Hellfire. Allah—Glorified is He—gives us a golden opportunity, a chance to avoid the worst of fates. You’re thinking, “Yeah…I heard that in the khutba last year…and the year before that…and the year before that…so is Eid on Thursday or Friday?” But let’s pump the proverbial brakes for a second—what exactly are we talking about here? Should we be grateful for this chance? Is it even a big deal? I mean, should we really be worried about whether or not we’ve secured Allah’s pardon in these nights?

The other day I was reading a short Hadith in Riyadh-us-Saliheen, in the Book of Tawbah (i.e Repentance), which read: "Ibn Abbas and Anas ibn Malik (radiy Allahu 'anhumaa) reported: the Messenger of Allah (sal Allahu alaihi wa sallam) said, 'If a son of Adam were to own a valley full of gold, he would desire to have two. Nothing can fill his mouth except the earth (of the grave). Allah turns with mercy to him who turns to Him in repentance.'"

The value and meaning(s) of this Hadith aside (for now), it was a note in the Arabic commentary that really caught my attention. In explaining the Arabic phrase for "Nothing can fill his mouth except dirt", the author said "i.e. the Son of Adam is never satisfied until he dies and finds himself under the dirt/earth, and this same person is just like Jahannam (bear with the comparison for a second <-- my comment), in that as much as is thrown into it, it says, 'Are there any more to come?!' "

This is referring to an Ayah in Surat Qaf, and here begins my "reflection". The Ayah reads: "One Day We will ask Hell, 'Art thou filled to the full?' It will say, 'Are there any more (to come)?!' SubhanAllah, whenever I hear this Ayah, and the ones before it, I cannot help but become overwhelmed with humble fear—and if it's in Salah, the closest thing to true khushoo' that I have yet to experience.

“[This is] a blessed Book which We have revealed to you, [O Muhammad, sallallaahu alayhi wa sallam], that they might reflect upon its verses and that those of understanding would be reminded.” [Quran: 38: 29]

The passage from Surat Qaf (Ayahs 16-30) reads:

16. And We have already created man and know what his soul whispers to him, and We are closer to him than [his] jugular vein

17. When the two receivers receive, seated on the right and on the left.

18. Man does not utter any word except that with him is an observer prepared [to record].

19. And the intoxication of death will bring the truth; that is what you were trying to avoid.

20. And the Horn will be blown. That is the Day of [carrying out] the threat.

21. And every soul will come, with it a driver and a witness.

22. [It will be said], "You were certainly in unmindfulness of this, and We have removed from you your cover, so your sight, this Day, is sharp."

23. And his companion, [the angel], will say, "This [record] is what is with me, prepared."

24. (The sentence will be) "Throw into Hell every contumacious Rejector (of God)

25. Preventer of good, aggressor, and doubter

26. Who made [as equal] with Allah another deity; then throw him into the severe punishment."

27. His [devil] companion will say, "Our Lord, I did not make him transgress, but he [himself] was in extreme error."

28. [ Allah ] will say, "Do not dispute before Me, while I had already presented to you the warning.

29. The word will not be changed with Me, and never will I be unjust to the servants."

30. On the Day We will say to Hell, "Have you been filled?" and it will say, "Are there more (to come)?!"

These Ayahs bear many messages, but I'd like to quickly highlight a few points, and then I'm done; please note that all "advices" are directed at me first:

• Allah knows us and our natures with omniscience; we should always remember this when our trust in Him begins to waver—the times when we prefer our desires and intellectual exercises to His Orders.

• We are all to meet death. This is known, and this is unavoidable. However, all of us—perhaps myself especially—often live as though this is a distant reality. Ayah 19 affirms this illusion of ours. The Prophet (sal Allahu alaihi wa sallam) advised us to remember the "destroyer of pleasures" (i.e. death) often—because when we do, we give ourselves a pointed reminder; we awaken, if only momentarily, from our state of heedlessness ("ghaflah"), and realize that everything we're currently pursuing is temporary and worthless when compared to the eternity that we should be working for. Life loses that addictive flavor that we get caught up in—a blandness we need every now and then.

• We will experience Yaqeen (certainty of knowledge in its utmost form) of the Akhira no matter what, because on the Day of Judgment no one will be able to deny its Truth; might as well work towards establishing that Yaqeen NOW, so that it doesn't haunt us when Ayah 22 becomes manifest.

• No one will bear our sins for us. We must own up to our mistakes, and do all that we can to avoid them. Part of this is avoiding those who encourage us to do wrong, however slight it may be. You don't want Ayah 27 happening to you. Allah also says in Surat-ul-Baqarah that, on the Day when evil "leaders" claim nothing to do with their followers, those followers will wish that they had but just ONE CHANCE to go back to the dunya and change things.

• Allah is Ultimately Just; He will never wrong any of His servants, and so we must understand that the fruits of our actions—ripe or rotten—are ours to bear. 

• Hellfire doesn't have a maximum capacity. Don't get caught up in relative determinism. Don't assume that, simply because we are living in a society that is being rapidly consumed by fasaad and jahiliyyah, we are "good enough" or that we will be ok as we are. The standard for Allah's Pleasure is still the same as it was during times of antiquity. Make sure you don't fall for Shaitan's whisperings that you are among the "saved".

• However, Paradise is just as vast. Never give up on the Mercy of Allah. He (subhanahu wa ta’ala) addresses His servants in the Quran, explicitly urging those of us who wrong our own souls to never lose hope in the Mercy of Allah. Strive to be among the steadfast, and Allah will provide for you a path.

So is salvation from the Hellfire something to be thankful for? I’d say so. In Surat Ibraheem Allah mentions that, no matter how hard we can try to enumerate His blessings upon us, there is no way we’d encompass them all. One more to add to the list I guess. But it’s definitely one we should shed tears of gratefulness for. Allah only knows how many nights we fall asleep soundly, content in our sinfulness, when we should actually be gripped with the fear of our inadequacies. Let the tranquility of Allah’s Mercy wash over you, but never take it for granted. Alhamdulillah, we have the Quran to remind us—and verily, it is the best of reminders.

That's all I have for now. Please keep me in your duaa. Anything beneficial in this post is from Allah, and anything incorrect is from me. 

Jazakum Allahu khairan, wassalamu alaikum.

Pee Ess I’d definitely like to hear your thoughts. Please share, so that we can all benefit.

Anonymous Contributor

Tampa, FL

We Went to Give, But Instead Received So Much More in Return

I held her hand as the elevator navigated its way to the first floor. It was time for her to go back. Neither of us wanted to let go.

The Alzheimer's ward of any nursing home is one of the most depressing places one could ever visit. The people there are living in an alternate universe, complete with fantasies that can sometimes be unnerving. Not being recognized by your own mother, father, or sibling can be unbearable to some. Most stop visiting at all.

3....2....1. The elevator came to a complete stop. I felt her hand gently squeeze mine as the doors opened, revealing the stark white lobby before us. The attendant was already waiting down the hall to escort my new friend Lela to her room. 

Our time together was up.

After exiting the elevator, I leaned down to tell her how much I had enjoyed her company. As she listened, I felt her squeezing my hand tighter, her face contorted in deep thought. I couldn’t help wonder what she was thinking.

She tapped my shoulder, pulling me in for a hug. The force she used was surprising for such a frail body. She loosened her grip but made sure our faces we’re still eye level. Holding my gaze, she did the most unexpected thing of all...she spoke.

“Thank you,” she whispered.

I stood there, paralyzed in shock. Besides communicating with smiles and hand gestures, she’d barely said a word all day. The nurses said Lela’s Alzheimer's made it difficult for her to communicate with the outside world, forcing her to go days, sometimes weeks without speaking to anyone. 

What about to someone she’d never met? I asked. “Forget it,” they had said. 

Yet, for that moment in time, Lela proved them all wrong. She wasn’t a “hopeless case”. All she needed was for someone to show her that they cared. Even if that person happened to be a complete stranger.

Our eyes stayed locked for one more second before the attendant wheeled her away down the hall and disappeared around a corner. I stood there a minute longer, letting the weight of that moment crash over me. Tears welled up in my eyes.

The day had definitely not gone as planned. All the meticulous planning, pretty schedules, and sheer organization we were armed with had all evaporated the second we stepped foot into the John Knox nursing home. Everything felt like it was falling apart.

But as I stood there in that deserted hallway, reflecting on the events that ensued as a result, none of that initial chaos mattered.

I thought of the joy I saw in our new friend Ana’s face as Ala, Hadeel and Sundus played a high paced game of pictionary with her and others. She told us solemnly that at 90 years old, she expected “to die in this place.” But her face quickly brightened when she recounted how much fun she had with us today.

Or the amusement that filled our new friend John’s face as Mohammad and Imtiaz taught him how to play Connect Four for the first time. I remember glancing over to see how the game was going, instead finding them engrossed in a deep conversation....Connect Four was never really that interesting anyways.

The sound of Elizabeth, Saira, and Riazul’s laughter at our new friend Peggy’s sarcasm was still ringing in my ears. Her spunky personality definitely seemed like it was cultivated over a lifetime of traveling and interesting experiences. All that she needed to shine was an audience....and now that she had one, her face couldn’t be anymore radiant.

“Excuse me ma’am, are you lost?” 

The nurse’s voice echoing from the distance cut through my thoughts and brought me spinning back into reality. I hadn’t realized how long I had been standing in that hallway. I shook my head and slowly started walking back to the elevator.

Something Peggy had said earlier that day really stuck with me. “Never put something you could do today on hold. Ever,” she sighed. “Or you’ll end up sitting one day wondering if you had spent your days actually living your life or watching it being lived from a distance.”

SubhnaAllah, there’s one gift Allah (swt) gave so many of us that we often take for granted. We never think about it, even though we live it everyday. How we make use of this gift could possibly make or break our entire life.

That gift is youth.

Ali ibn Abi Talib (raddyah Allahu Anahu) once said, "Everyone who is taken by death asks for more time, while everyone who still has time makes excuses for procrastination.”

So many times we are tempted to push things to tomorrow. How often do we wonder, however, if there’s going to be a tomorrow? 

Or if we’re lucky enough to make it to old age inshaAllah, do we want to be among those who end up regretting a lifetime of not seizing opportunities as they came our way, those who are scratching their heads wondering, “What If?

Life was never meant to be put on hold. It was meant to be cherished. There’s a big difference between living and simply being alive.

The Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) said: "A servant of God will remain standing on the Day of Judgment until he is questioned about his (time on earth) and how he used it; about his knowledge and how he utilized it; about his wealth and from where he acquired it and in what (activities) he spent it; and about his body and how he used it." 

When you think about all the time we waste, its a scary thought, isn’t it? But subhanAllah, Allah would never test us with a challenge that we wouldn’t be able to handle. Its matter of realizing where we’re going wrong and making a change before it’s too late.

Being busy is a blessing, not a curse. It gives us a chance to fully live every moment of our life, because time, unlike anything else precious in the world, cannot be bought back with anything.

When I hear somebody sigh, "Life is hard," I am always tempted to ask, "Compared to what?" Life's challenges are not supposed to paralyze you, they're supposed to help you discover who you really are. Things go wrong so we can appreciate them when they’re right. Good things sometimes fall apart so better ones can fall together. It’s the divine scheme of things that makes living so absolutely invigorating. 

I felt a smile creeping upon my lips as I watched the elevator doors starting to close. There was only one word left on my mind:

Alhamdulilah.

Sarah Kassem

University of Florida

Muslim Youth for Truth Co-Founder

   

The Golden Rule: Treat Others Like You Want To Be Treated

In the name of God, the Most Beneficent, the Most Merciful.

If one were to imagine a 'perfect world,' coexistence would be a paramount element. If people could eliminate any preconceived resentment that they held against a particular person/people in accordance to their race, religion, etc., the world would be a more pleasant place. Even though coexistence may seem like something imaginary, it is possible to attain a society where people legitimately live in peace. It goes without saying, that the three monotheistic religions all share the common principle of "doing to others what you want done to you." 

In Islam, the aspect of coexistence is very significant as we see in the following verse of the Qur'an: "O mankind! We created you out of a single pair of male and female, and We made you into different nations and tribes so that you may get to know and love one another. Not that you may despise each other. Surely, the greatest of you in the eyes of God is the most righteous." [49:13] In an ancient conversation regarding Judaism, someone asked for the explanation of the religion [in the time it took them to stand on one leg]… the response given was: "What is hateful to you, do not do to your fellow..." In a verse from the Bible it is said: “But I say to you who hear, Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you…” [Luke 6:27]

The parallel that can be drawn is that all three religions regard the treating of others as imperative matters. Neither religion creates special exceptions how to treat people, but instead the address of being good to your neighbor is applicable to all of humanity. Although this commonality of kindness is apparent in each of the main religions, I want to focus more directly on two of them. Judaism and Islam. The reason I bring up Judaism is because unfortunately when Muslims think of Jews- hateful stereotypes penetrate into their minds' and pierce their hearts'.

Being a Palestinian Muslim, I identify with the frustration and hurt that is felt… Similarly, I understand that the same feelings are felt on the opposite side in regards to the Jews. However, unlike many Palestinians I am also somewhat exposed to the other side. One of my closest friends since childhood, who lived in the next neighborhood is Jewish. Right down the street from me lives a Jewish family; an Israeli family. They are, by far, and without doubt some of the best and most genuine people I know. One thing about America, is that because it is "a melting pot" it allows a person to be separated from their people without loosing their identity or beliefs. In America, people who would normally throw stones or missiles at each other, can come together in authentic harmony and share a life of friendship together [without the contamination of a conflict. etc.] In America, the beauty of coexistence can flourish. 

I choose to coexist with my neighbors because Islamically, they have that right upon me, and out of the sincere kindness they've shown me and my family, I owe them that much. Whether the piece of land between Egypt, Jordan, and the Mediterranean is called Palestine or Israel, the inhabitants: Muslim, Christian, or Jewish can still find a way to live peacefully like they did for hundreds of years under the Ottoman Empire and in so many other places. 

As continual as it sounds, the first step to a permanent coexistence has to come from within your heart. If you are fully capable of truly accepting and loving another human being for the sake of pleasing God, without holding a prejudice against them for any particular reason [ie. religion, political views, color of skin] then you can honestly declare that you coexist with others. If not, you should evaluate your heart because in an authentic saying of the prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) it was said that: "God does not show mercy to those who aren't merciful to others." This is only a reminder to myself before anyone else. I ask God to make us amongst the righteous: those who easily forgive the people who wrong them, and those who are intent on loving one another for His sake only. Ameen.


Malak Fakhoury
Vanguard High
Muslim Youth for Truth Contributer

Everyone has a Story: Beauty or the Beast: My Quest to Find the Real Me

What is Beauty? To a model, beauty may be having a certain body type. Beauty from a doctor’s point of view  could be to the ability to help other people in their time of need. To a writer, beauty could be the crafting of words to convey a message. To a painter, beauty might mean the ability to convey a feeling through an image. From a reader’s perspective, beauty could be the way writing captivates imagination. There are many different ways human beings view beauty.  What way is the best way to view beauty you ask? I can’t answer that question—that is a question you have to answer yourself. One thing I can tell you is how to not view beauty. We all face struggles in life—and it was through these struggles that I learned what beauty really is. I know for a fact that I am not the only human that endures hardship in life. That being said, I am not writing this to be praised or recognized. I am writing this for the sake of Allah (SWT), in the hopes of bringing light to a topic that is not really discussed.  I also know that I am not alone in what I faced. I hope that I am the voice for everyone that has never had the courage to say anything about it. I debated for many days whether or not I should make this story anonymous—I decided not to. I want everyone who reads this to know that this story is real.  And what better way to do that than to reveal my identity?

  

I remember it like it was yesterday. 

           

 I was in a square desk all to myself, as the rest of my classmates arranged their desks in a circle. I got out of my desk to move it into the circle because we were about to read a chapter in American History.  As I was moving my desk, someone yelped:“Oh my goodness Sundus your nose is so big! Hahah, you look just like Toucan Sam!”. My heartbeat raced and my hands started to shake. What could I possibly answer back to such a statement? My nose certainly is not small, so I could not tell this person that he/she is lying. I decided I would ignore his/her statement. As I ignored the hurtful comments, they only got worse. Now, I had almost everyone in the class making fun of my nose in some way. This was no longer a joke, I went home everyday crying. I hated the way I looked, and I wanted nothing more than for people to accept me. But they never did. The teasing got so bad that I finally decided to stick up for myself. I remember saying:“What you are saying to me is not nice, please stop”. Little did I know that by saying this, I would get made fun of even more. The people that made fun of me  said in a very sarcastic tone:“ Oh Sundus says it’s not nice, like we care !”

                                     

When this happened to me, I was very young, and it was very hard for me to  deal with. It is one thing to be made fun of by a couple of class bullies occasionally, but it was not like that for me. Practically everyone in the class made fun of me every day.  I heard that I was ugly because of my nose so often that I started to believe it. For two years straight, I was made fun of by more than half of the class.  When I looked in the mirror, I would examine my nose for long periods of time asking myself whether or not something really was wrong with the way I looked. My thoughts were consumed with the “so-called” flaw my peers pointed out to me. As I got older, the teasing stopped. People were still pointing out others “flaws”, but I guess they didn’t bother pointing out mine anymore because they did it so much that it was an old story. 

Even though the bullying stopped, I was still self-conscious about my nose and image in general. And how could I not be? I was teased for two years straight everyday! Many life experiences helped me see past what my peers said were my “flaws”. The experience that helped me the most was when my sister Layla had to have a brain surgery in the middle of the night. Her shunt was no longer working properly, and she had to have a new shunt put in. I stayed up all night with my family in the waiting room, awaiting the results. As I sat in the waiting room, I thought about my life. I thought about how my sister might not survive. I thought about how close death is to everyone, even though I was not the one having the surgery. Death is not always expected, just as my sister’s surgery was not planned. 

As everyone waited in the waiting room, I walked into the bathroom. I looked in the mirror like always, but this time, something was different. Tears started to flow from my eyes as I stared into my reflection. Why would I spend one more second thinking about the way I looked when it would never benefit me?  How could I criticize my nose when there are some people that wished they even had a nose because they were born without one? This time, when I looked in the mirror, I didn’t see myself as an ugly girl with a messed up nose. I saw a servant of Allah (SWT), and it was then—and only then –then that I was truly happy to look in the mirror. I saw my physical features as the creation of Allah (SWT), and I could never be upset with the way he created me.  From that day on, it never bothered me in the slightest when someone made an offensive comment towards my appearance. 

 When I was younger and made fun of often, I wanted nothing more than to change who I was so that the people who made fun of me would accept me. I remember  making Duaa to Allah(SWT), asking him why he gave me a different nose ,and why so many of the people that I thought were my friends would make fun of me. It was not until many years later that I got the answer to my Duaa-- this life is not about being accepted by other people, but it is about gaining acceptance from Allah (SWT).

 At the time I was being teased, I thought it would be the greatest thing in the world to get plastic surgery to change my nose so that I would be accepted.  But Allah (SWT) knew what was best for me, and he didn’t give me plastic surgery. Allah (SWT) did not give me the acceptance that I longed to have for so long. What Allah(SWT) gave me was so much better than what I wanted. Allah (SWT) gave me the ability to see beauty in all of his creation. He gave me the wisdom to realize that no one is worth pleasing except for him. 

Many people have had to deal with bullying – even in the Muslim community. What happened to me is not a unique story. If you are being teased or you know someone who is being teased, then please do something about it. We don’t realize how much the demeaning statements can hurt someone until we are victims of them.  As for the people that made fun of me, I have nothing against any of them. I know that when this happened, they were young and unaware of how what they did would hurt me. Many of them apologized to me years later, and I accepted the apology. If I made a similar mistake, I would want someone to forgive me as well. I do not blame any of them, because I know they did not intentionally hurt my feelings.

                                             

 I did not write this to receive praise, sympathy, empathy or recognition. Please, hold your “ Thanks” and “ You are such a good person” comments. I wrote this with the intention of pleasing Allah (SWT) . Without Allah(SWT) guiding me, I would have never realized all of the beauties of life that cannot be seen. It would be wrong for me to say that I realized all of these things on my own, because I did not.

 If we want to find beauty, we must remember the simple things that we sometimes overlook. This is a reminder to myself before anyone else.

Beauty is the love for Allah (SWT) that fills my heart when I am making sujood.   Beauty is the laughter I share with my father when he tells me a funny joke. Beauty is when my sister shows me how to be content with little. Beauty is serving Allah (SWT). Beauty is when my little brother whispers in my ear that he loves having me as a sister. Beauty is when I chase Sara Samaha down the beach with a sand-ball in my hand prepared to throw at her . Beauty is when my mother hugs me tightly before I leave to class. Beauty is strong character. Beauty is the recitation of the Quran. Beauty is the Masjid on Eid.

                       

 I know from personal experience that it is not easy to see beauty beyond appearance. But it is possible. Once you find beauty beyond what your eyes can see, you will never look at things the same again.

Literally.

Sundus Alsharif

Hillsborough Community College

Muslim Youth for Truth Contributer