The Golden Rule: Treat Others Like You Want To Be Treated

In the name of God, the Most Beneficent, the Most Merciful.

If one were to imagine a 'perfect world,' coexistence would be a paramount element. If people could eliminate any preconceived resentment that they held against a particular person/people in accordance to their race, religion, etc., the world would be a more pleasant place. Even though coexistence may seem like something imaginary, it is possible to attain a society where people legitimately live in peace. It goes without saying, that the three monotheistic religions all share the common principle of "doing to others what you want done to you." 

In Islam, the aspect of coexistence is very significant as we see in the following verse of the Qur'an: "O mankind! We created you out of a single pair of male and female, and We made you into different nations and tribes so that you may get to know and love one another. Not that you may despise each other. Surely, the greatest of you in the eyes of God is the most righteous." [49:13] In an ancient conversation regarding Judaism, someone asked for the explanation of the religion [in the time it took them to stand on one leg]… the response given was: "What is hateful to you, do not do to your fellow..." In a verse from the Bible it is said: “But I say to you who hear, Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you…” [Luke 6:27]

The parallel that can be drawn is that all three religions regard the treating of others as imperative matters. Neither religion creates special exceptions how to treat people, but instead the address of being good to your neighbor is applicable to all of humanity. Although this commonality of kindness is apparent in each of the main religions, I want to focus more directly on two of them. Judaism and Islam. The reason I bring up Judaism is because unfortunately when Muslims think of Jews- hateful stereotypes penetrate into their minds' and pierce their hearts'.

Being a Palestinian Muslim, I identify with the frustration and hurt that is felt… Similarly, I understand that the same feelings are felt on the opposite side in regards to the Jews. However, unlike many Palestinians I am also somewhat exposed to the other side. One of my closest friends since childhood, who lived in the next neighborhood is Jewish. Right down the street from me lives a Jewish family; an Israeli family. They are, by far, and without doubt some of the best and most genuine people I know. One thing about America, is that because it is "a melting pot" it allows a person to be separated from their people without loosing their identity or beliefs. In America, people who would normally throw stones or missiles at each other, can come together in authentic harmony and share a life of friendship together [without the contamination of a conflict. etc.] In America, the beauty of coexistence can flourish. 

I choose to coexist with my neighbors because Islamically, they have that right upon me, and out of the sincere kindness they've shown me and my family, I owe them that much. Whether the piece of land between Egypt, Jordan, and the Mediterranean is called Palestine or Israel, the inhabitants: Muslim, Christian, or Jewish can still find a way to live peacefully like they did for hundreds of years under the Ottoman Empire and in so many other places. 

As continual as it sounds, the first step to a permanent coexistence has to come from within your heart. If you are fully capable of truly accepting and loving another human being for the sake of pleasing God, without holding a prejudice against them for any particular reason [ie. religion, political views, color of skin] then you can honestly declare that you coexist with others. If not, you should evaluate your heart because in an authentic saying of the prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) it was said that: "God does not show mercy to those who aren't merciful to others." This is only a reminder to myself before anyone else. I ask God to make us amongst the righteous: those who easily forgive the people who wrong them, and those who are intent on loving one another for His sake only. Ameen.


Malak Fakhoury
Vanguard High
Muslim Youth for Truth Contributer

Everyone has a Story: Beauty or the Beast: My Quest to Find the Real Me

What is Beauty? To a model, beauty may be having a certain body type. Beauty from a doctor’s point of view  could be to the ability to help other people in their time of need. To a writer, beauty could be the crafting of words to convey a message. To a painter, beauty might mean the ability to convey a feeling through an image. From a reader’s perspective, beauty could be the way writing captivates imagination. There are many different ways human beings view beauty.  What way is the best way to view beauty you ask? I can’t answer that question—that is a question you have to answer yourself. One thing I can tell you is how to not view beauty. We all face struggles in life—and it was through these struggles that I learned what beauty really is. I know for a fact that I am not the only human that endures hardship in life. That being said, I am not writing this to be praised or recognized. I am writing this for the sake of Allah (SWT), in the hopes of bringing light to a topic that is not really discussed.  I also know that I am not alone in what I faced. I hope that I am the voice for everyone that has never had the courage to say anything about it. I debated for many days whether or not I should make this story anonymous—I decided not to. I want everyone who reads this to know that this story is real.  And what better way to do that than to reveal my identity?

  

I remember it like it was yesterday. 

           

 I was in a square desk all to myself, as the rest of my classmates arranged their desks in a circle. I got out of my desk to move it into the circle because we were about to read a chapter in American History.  As I was moving my desk, someone yelped:“Oh my goodness Sundus your nose is so big! Hahah, you look just like Toucan Sam!”. My heartbeat raced and my hands started to shake. What could I possibly answer back to such a statement? My nose certainly is not small, so I could not tell this person that he/she is lying. I decided I would ignore his/her statement. As I ignored the hurtful comments, they only got worse. Now, I had almost everyone in the class making fun of my nose in some way. This was no longer a joke, I went home everyday crying. I hated the way I looked, and I wanted nothing more than for people to accept me. But they never did. The teasing got so bad that I finally decided to stick up for myself. I remember saying:“What you are saying to me is not nice, please stop”. Little did I know that by saying this, I would get made fun of even more. The people that made fun of me  said in a very sarcastic tone:“ Oh Sundus says it’s not nice, like we care !”

                                     

When this happened to me, I was very young, and it was very hard for me to  deal with. It is one thing to be made fun of by a couple of class bullies occasionally, but it was not like that for me. Practically everyone in the class made fun of me every day.  I heard that I was ugly because of my nose so often that I started to believe it. For two years straight, I was made fun of by more than half of the class.  When I looked in the mirror, I would examine my nose for long periods of time asking myself whether or not something really was wrong with the way I looked. My thoughts were consumed with the “so-called” flaw my peers pointed out to me. As I got older, the teasing stopped. People were still pointing out others “flaws”, but I guess they didn’t bother pointing out mine anymore because they did it so much that it was an old story. 

Even though the bullying stopped, I was still self-conscious about my nose and image in general. And how could I not be? I was teased for two years straight everyday! Many life experiences helped me see past what my peers said were my “flaws”. The experience that helped me the most was when my sister Layla had to have a brain surgery in the middle of the night. Her shunt was no longer working properly, and she had to have a new shunt put in. I stayed up all night with my family in the waiting room, awaiting the results. As I sat in the waiting room, I thought about my life. I thought about how my sister might not survive. I thought about how close death is to everyone, even though I was not the one having the surgery. Death is not always expected, just as my sister’s surgery was not planned. 

As everyone waited in the waiting room, I walked into the bathroom. I looked in the mirror like always, but this time, something was different. Tears started to flow from my eyes as I stared into my reflection. Why would I spend one more second thinking about the way I looked when it would never benefit me?  How could I criticize my nose when there are some people that wished they even had a nose because they were born without one? This time, when I looked in the mirror, I didn’t see myself as an ugly girl with a messed up nose. I saw a servant of Allah (SWT), and it was then—and only then –then that I was truly happy to look in the mirror. I saw my physical features as the creation of Allah (SWT), and I could never be upset with the way he created me.  From that day on, it never bothered me in the slightest when someone made an offensive comment towards my appearance. 

 When I was younger and made fun of often, I wanted nothing more than to change who I was so that the people who made fun of me would accept me. I remember  making Duaa to Allah(SWT), asking him why he gave me a different nose ,and why so many of the people that I thought were my friends would make fun of me. It was not until many years later that I got the answer to my Duaa-- this life is not about being accepted by other people, but it is about gaining acceptance from Allah (SWT).

 At the time I was being teased, I thought it would be the greatest thing in the world to get plastic surgery to change my nose so that I would be accepted.  But Allah (SWT) knew what was best for me, and he didn’t give me plastic surgery. Allah (SWT) did not give me the acceptance that I longed to have for so long. What Allah(SWT) gave me was so much better than what I wanted. Allah (SWT) gave me the ability to see beauty in all of his creation. He gave me the wisdom to realize that no one is worth pleasing except for him. 

Many people have had to deal with bullying – even in the Muslim community. What happened to me is not a unique story. If you are being teased or you know someone who is being teased, then please do something about it. We don’t realize how much the demeaning statements can hurt someone until we are victims of them.  As for the people that made fun of me, I have nothing against any of them. I know that when this happened, they were young and unaware of how what they did would hurt me. Many of them apologized to me years later, and I accepted the apology. If I made a similar mistake, I would want someone to forgive me as well. I do not blame any of them, because I know they did not intentionally hurt my feelings.

                                             

 I did not write this to receive praise, sympathy, empathy or recognition. Please, hold your “ Thanks” and “ You are such a good person” comments. I wrote this with the intention of pleasing Allah (SWT) . Without Allah(SWT) guiding me, I would have never realized all of the beauties of life that cannot be seen. It would be wrong for me to say that I realized all of these things on my own, because I did not.

 If we want to find beauty, we must remember the simple things that we sometimes overlook. This is a reminder to myself before anyone else.

Beauty is the love for Allah (SWT) that fills my heart when I am making sujood.   Beauty is the laughter I share with my father when he tells me a funny joke. Beauty is when my sister shows me how to be content with little. Beauty is serving Allah (SWT). Beauty is when my little brother whispers in my ear that he loves having me as a sister. Beauty is when I chase Sara Samaha down the beach with a sand-ball in my hand prepared to throw at her . Beauty is when my mother hugs me tightly before I leave to class. Beauty is strong character. Beauty is the recitation of the Quran. Beauty is the Masjid on Eid.

                       

 I know from personal experience that it is not easy to see beauty beyond appearance. But it is possible. Once you find beauty beyond what your eyes can see, you will never look at things the same again.

Literally.

Sundus Alsharif

Hillsborough Community College

Muslim Youth for Truth Contributer

Everyone has a Story: Elizabeth's Journey to Becoming Muslim

     I’ll start by saying that practically everyone in my family is of a different religion. Prior to converting to Islam, I called myself an Agnostic, along with my mother and older sister. All I knew was that I believed in God and everything else was product of man. I wasn’t even looking for a religion to convert to when I found Islam; I was perfectly happy as an Agnostic. During my junior year in high school, I had my first boyfriend who just so happened to be the only Muslim in town (it was a very small town). I knew he was Muslim but I had no idea what that was or meant. Meanwhile, I had a job at a hotel working nights and whenever I had a free chance I would get lost looking at all the information there was on Islam on the internet. I learned so much that it overwhelmed me at first. The only reason I ever looked any of this stuff up was to learn exactly what my current boyfriend believed in. I thought it was ridiculous for me to be so close to someone and not know their morals and beliefs. However, after a few weeks of doing research, I told him what I had learned and he was dumbfounded merely because none of his other girlfriends ever made the effort to do this. He was my first (and only) boyfriend I had, so I thought it was only normal for me to do this: apparently not. In any case, he was extremely supportive of me learning about Islam and he would further my interest by telling me things I hadn’t learned yet. It was at this point I gave up pork and alcohol forever, although I did not drink alcohol prior to this for personal reasons. 
      

    A few months after researching Islam, it was Ramadan, and my boyfriend had told me it was totally up to me if I wanted to fast, so I did. It was very hard the first few days because I was working and had school, but I got through it alhumdillilah. All my friends and family knew I was reading up on this new religion and fully supported me. In fact, I was able to give them some helpful information about it that many don’t realize: such as the fact that it is NOT polytheistic and actually stems from Christianity and Judaism. These were primarily the main misconceptions. During my first Ramadan I was given an English Qur’an and began reading it as well as highlighting certain phrases that stuck out to me. 
     

   During my first semester of college I took an Intro to Islam course that was taught by a convert. This course was incredibly interesting to me and since the class was often quizzed on Arabic words, it forced me to learn them and become familiar with them. I enjoyed the professor’s teaching so much that I am currently taking my fourth class with her. This class gave me so much knowledge on the Prophet Muhammad, peace be upon him, and others, as well as the history behind Islam. This class made me realize Arabic is a big part of being a Muslim; therefore, I decided I needed to take Arabic before my conversion.
     

    It would be two years later that I would get into an Arabic class. Although I took so many Islam courses to pass the time in college, I had a better understanding of Islam than some Muslims I knew. Not to mention, every Ramadan, YouTube was my best friend. I would listen to so many young people talk about their conversion process and how they are enjoying their lives now. One main problem in my life that kept me from becoming Muslim was in fact the person that brought it into my life: my boyfriend. I knew I couldn’t date someone after saying my Shahadah, nor would I want to, but at this point in our three and a half year relationship, it was too hard to break up with someone you loved and spent every day with. 
      
   During the summer of 2009 I had a hard course load and could not work that much, and without my scholarships, I had a hard time paying bills. This took its toll on me physically and mentally. I had accumulated so much anxiety I had to see a doctor because my parents were getting worried about me. It was as if the stress of life was getting too hard and my relationship with my boyfriend was getting worse and worse because of anxiety. I realized once Ramadan started that’s what was missing from my life, Islam. It had been probably a year since I had taken an Islam course, so I figured I needed Islam back in my life.

     The beginning of my 3^rd year in college, just a few months ago as a matter of fact, it was three days until Eid al-Fitr.  I came home from work and my boyfriend told me he wanted to break up with me because he felt it was wrong for us to continue a relationship. I completely agreed and understood this to mean we were still on our path to getting married in the future.  So the next day at work, I realized that I am enrolled in an Arabic class and have no boyfriend; therefore I had nothing holding me back. I told a Muslim lady I worked with and that I feel its time for me to convert soon. She immediately suggested I convert on Eid in front of the entire congregation. This was NOT what I had in mind. I was thinking more private with just Muslimas but she had convinced me that it was an honor to witness someone say their Shahada, so I figured, who was I to take that away from the men?  That night, my friend at work gave me clothes to wear as well as a hijab, or headscarf, and made all the arrangements with the Imam. All I had to do was show up.

       When I get there with my friend the morning of Eid I cannot stop crying. At the time I felt so foolish because here are all these Muslim women looking at me like I’m crazy.  I told my friend I didn’t think I could get through the Shahadah without crying. I had made it a point that I would never speak the words of the Shahadah even in a whisper because I believed those words were saved for the day I converted, so when everyone told me to practice, I firmly said no.  But when the time came to say it, I spoke clearly and without any sniffles. Shukran Allah. However, the rest of the time I was back to crying. It was an amazing feeling though. Everyone hugged me and congratulated me. Some of my Muslim classmates were there, as well as my Islam professor.

      The rest of the day did not go as smoothly as it should have. My now ex-boyfriend decided that this was the day he was going to tell me we had no future together; that he no longer loved me. This made me fall into a very deep depression that I’m now glad to say it was thanks to Allah I am still here. My determination to prayer was the only thing keeping me from the dark. For two months I lived like a hermit and didn’t bother to meet my fellow Muslim sisters or go to any Islam meetings. I felt too alone. 
     
   November was my saving grace. A young girl in one of my Islam classes introduced me to some Muslim girls that were on the Executive board of Islam on Campus. They took me to my first Jumaah on campus and out to eat later that night. Just their company alone meant so much to me. Later I was invited to a Halaqa where I met other Muslim girls and began friendships with many of them. In fact, the person who asked me to write this blog is one of those people who has no idea how much her kind words kept me out of the dark and on the road to living life as a proud Muslim convert. I am currently extremely happy I converted and am so thankful to Allah for giving me such wonderful friends.

“Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle.”

                                                        -Plato


Elizabeth Wood
University of Florida
Muslim Youth for Truth Contributer

"My friends made me do it." How to deal with peer pressure and getting the courage to finally say NO.

When you hear the words peer pressure, what comes to mind?

Defined straight from Webster’s Dictionary, peer pressure means “influence of one’s friends on morals”. That being said, peer pressure can be both positive and negative. However, I am going to discuss the negative sides of peer pressure in the Muslim community. In addition to looking at the dark side of peer pressure, we will explore how to avoid peer pressure and what to do if you have already endured peer pressure. 

From the outside looking in, it is so easy for all of us to look at our Muslim friends that are engaging in haram activities as “bad” or “sinful”. But what we fail to understand is that our friends did not end up this way overnight. They did not just wake up and say “Today, I feel like displeasing Allah (SWT)”. Changes in behavior, whether they are beneficial or malignant, take time. I remember reading somewhere that shaytan whispers to people to engage in small sins first, then he works his way up to the larger sins. This is a very dangerous tactic. In our minds, it is only a small sin, right? But to shaytan, and some of our friends, it is a plan that leads us to bigger sins. 

The best way to avoid peer pressure is to avoid any situation that makes it easy for haram activities to occur. What do I mean by this? If you are invited to a party by people that are known to drink, and you think / know there is going to be the consumption of alcoholic drinks there, simply do not go. Come up with an excuse as to why you cannot go. If you keep making excuses and not showing up, the people inviting you will eventually get the message in a kind way that you do not want to be around risky environments. Even if you think you can handle going to a party where risky behavior is going on, there are no guarantees. Once you are in that situation, it does not matter how religious you are. It does not matter how much Quran you have memorized, or how many Sunnah prayers you make. Human nature is human nature. Which is perfectly illustrated when we see the most religious family turn out to have kids that are addicted to drugs, partying, and more. This could happen to anyone, and it does not happen over night. I am not saying you will be able to avoid every situation that could lead to haram. Why that would be impossible! All I am saying is that it is essential we avoid all the situations that could lead to haram as we can. That way, if we have to battle one or two situations every once and a while, it would not be as difficult as avoiding that situation every time you have an outing with friends. 

Now that I have discussed how to avoid peer pressure, it is imperative we look at what to do if you have already given into negative peer pressure. If you have already been affected by peer pressure, the first step is recognizing it. Most people that have been affected by peer pressure do not even realize it. Or, they convince themselves that they are doing these haram activities out of their own wishes, and that other people have nothing to do with it. The question you must ask yourself is, “If I was living alone on Earth, only with the purpose of serving Allah (SWT), would I be engaging in this haram activity? Anyone that is a true Muslim would answer no to that. We all want to please Allah (SWT) and have the reward of the hereafter. 

The second step is having patience when making change. As I said earlier, the changes made in life happen over a span of time. None of us makes a change completely correct after the first attempt. Change at a pace that you are doing something, but not too slow that nothing gets done. A quote I find really helpful for destroying habits is “There is no need to fight old habits. Start new ones. It is the resisting of an old habit that puts you in that trench. Starting a new pattern is easy when done with childlike disregard for imagined difficulties. You can prove this to yourself by your own experience.”- W. Timothy Gallwey. 


The third step is making the change for Allah (SWT) only. When you try to change for your parents, friends, or strangers on the street, the change does not last. The reason it does not last is because those people are not always with you. If you are changing for other people, you will go back to your old ways as soon as no one is looking. This is between you and Allah (SWT), no one else. Making a change can be difficult. Not only do you have to deal with the personal struggle between you and Allah (SWT), but you also have to deal with what everyone else says about you. You have to deal with people scorning, saying things like “Oh so you want to change now, after all of the bad things you have done?!!!” You have to deal with saying goodbye to your friends that used to put you into haram situations. The way to deal with it is to focus on you. People are going to make hurtful comments, especially if they are not following the way of the prophet Muhammad (PBUH). Remember, this is not about them. It is about following Allah (SWT), and trying to make new, Islamic choices. And maybe, just maybe, you will stumble upon some people that know how to give advice islamically. If you do, hold on to them. It is rare to find a person that gives advice with gentleness, which is what we all need in times when we are engaging in haram activity.

 Before you think you are alone, remember, this could have happened to anyone. Even if we all are not facing your problems exactly, we are all struggling in this religion to obey Allah(SWT). 

But it is something worth struggling for.

Anonymous Contributor

MAS Tampa 3rd Annual Conference: Not Until You Change Yourself! December 19, 2009 8 am to 6 pm Held at USF Marshall Center

Asslamu Alkuim,

Alhamdulilah, the MAS conference held on December 19, 2009 was a huge success. As someone who attended, I left that night feeling very invigorated to go out there and make a change within myself. The speakers compelled us to think about issues that we are often faced with and see them from a purely Islamic perspective. For those of you who could not attend,  we have included links to both the introduction of the conference as well as an excerpt from the Gender Relations lecture. Additionally, MAS Media member Nora Zaki has complied brief notes from each lecture in the young adult program that will, inshaAllah, give you some of the benefit we all experienced on that day. Lastly,  if you scroll down towards the end of the post, we have included the MAS Media promotional video that was shown in the conclusion of the conference.

The Notes:

9am – 10 am: Role of a Muslim: Our Duty to the Muslim Community and American Society

Speakers: Imam Abdul Latif

we are the ummah wasat: the middle/balanced ummah

in order to be witnesses to be humankind, we must be examples!

our faith seems weak now, but there are glad tidings to those who are holding on

Ayman Hammous, VP of MAS

Surah Anfal states that one person can be equivalent to ten in Battle of Badr: It was never about the number but the quality of Muslims

Surah Hud, verses 116 and 117: Prohibit corruption on ALL earth, not just Muslim lands

Mecca was Muhammad’s ( saw) country and America is our country

Angel Gabriel gave the Prophet ( saw) the option to even destroy the Meccans after Taif but he refused to; instead, she he said that he wanted to guide his people

Why don’t we care about the 42 million uninsured Americans? Why don’t we care about the 22 million Americans with drug problems?

He mentioned an article that is Islamophobic with the title “A Knife in the Name of Allah” ( New York Times, I believe)

10am -- 11am: Transforming the Soul: Practical Steps for Purifying the Heart

Speaker: Imad Bayoun

the criteria for success is the soundness of the heart

One must remember the golden rule of treating people the way they would like to be treated: This rule must be followed by all Muslims

Cultural baggage has unfortunately become part of the religion, Islam

The change that comes is from the Islamic path, not cultural or anything else

The ashab were humans who had shortcomings too, so we should strive to change just like they did; Whenever a sahaba was inflicted by hardship, he would run to prayer

We have unfortunately reduced religion to fiqh, but the worship of the heart is different from the senses

How we can make our prayer better:

understanding the meaning: ‘khushu

true appreciation and a fear of God

know who you are talking to: it’s God!

the more you learn about God, the more everything changes

we are neglecting thikr, remembrance, so ponder on God’s many wonderful names

Really, close your eyes and ponder 

Count the blessings of Allah swt, but if you, you won’t be able to count them all

Think and ponder about the creation of Allah, but not the self of Allah swt

Books the speaker recommends:

The Character of the Muslim by Mohammed Al Ghazali

The Way of the Seeker by Ibn Qayyim

Imadbayoun.com

11a – 12pm: Reflecting on the Scripture: Quranic Guidelines for the Muslim Activist

Speaker: Imad Bayoun

where do we draw the line to blind faith and rationality? (In Islam, there is no blind faith).

Our mind tells us there is a God

We need to believe in the source, the Messenger, saw

We must also acknowledge the limitations of the mind

The Qur’an is mostly a book of guidance

Knowledge comes before iman because it guarantees that what we are believing is the truth

The call to act in Islam came in the very beginning:

~ We should be achieving certain standards of worship

~ Each person has an area they can contribute to

Surah Al Muddathir: God calls for work

Surah Al Muzammil: God calls for the spiritual connection of qiyam al lail

Read the Qur’an in slow parts, segments: tarteela ترتيلًا

What was revealed in Surah Al Muzammil was not enough to do qiyam al lail, but Muhammad (saw) performed the qiyam for 2/3 of the night. SubhanAllah!

You don’t have to be a hafeez to perform qiyam al lail. Muhammad (saw) had only a few verses and still did the prayer for this long of the night 

Muhammad (saw) read one verse the whole night: it was from Surah Al Imran

A person cannot say they do not know enough

Surah Muzammil was the fuel for Surah Muddathir **The work came from the beginning

What four elements must a Muslim activist have?

knowledge

action: work

spiritual connection with God

connective spirit of working with groups

The surat revealed to Prophet Muhammad (saw) after the Taif incident were meant to comfort him. These were Surat Musa, Qasas, Lut, Hijr and Ibrahim, for example. This was the same path taken by others before him.

Muhammad (saw) endured hardship: A great end is not possible without hardship in the beginning

When going through hardships, don’t focus entirely on them because they will change

Look back at stories of earlier people

And remember, it doesn’t take many people to have an impact 

It is a truth without exaggeration: “You are carrying this message after everyone has rejected it.” – Hassan Al Banna, founder of the Muslim Brotherhood

Feed the heart, direct your effort and find balance

Be accommodating to others

Don’t be judgmental

Accept people for who they are

1:20 pm – 2:30 pm: Gender Relations: Working Together within Allah’s Boundaries

Speaker: Hadia Mubarak

gender relations need to be normalized, not stigmatized

the extreme has become an overly powerful sexual image: Muslim men are growing up with images of non-mahram women

the women during the time of the Prophet Muhammad (saw) were not shunned from Islamic society

Allah swt sees you even if you think no one else does

The sahaba knew the names of their women companions

Modesty is more than just hijab; The women are not the only ones wearing the burden of the hijab

A man should not approach a woman for marriage unless he is FULLY ready

Hadia Mubarak mentioned a pre-marital questionnaire by Muhammad Majid. You can ask your potential spouse questions about each other with pre-made questions.

** Just keep marriage out of Islamic work and focus on helping the Muslim community

Speaker: Ayman Hammous

don’t mix Islam with a particular culture

whatever fiqh contradicts, pick the one that is more applicable to the culture in which a society is living in

After Muhammad (saw) died, his wives still continued to talk to men about religious matters and were still modest

There is no generic fatwa applicable to all gender relations, so set up the example most relevant to a society

Speaker: Imad Bayoun

the one who created is the one who legislated

there is a modesty of knowing that God is watching

Nothing goes for free: there is some struggle and resistance

Keep in mind the goal of paradise

Book recommendations: Al Alim: a book of Muslim women – all narrations from Bukhari and Muslim about the interactions between Muslim men and women

2:30 pm – 3:30 pm Social Manners: Dealing with Non Muslims

Speaker: Imam Abdul Latif

Don’t be harsh 

Remember Prophet Musa ( as) approached Pharaoh with gentle words. Look in Surah Taha

Muhammad (saw) treated the Jews with the utmost kindness and always helped people, regardless if they were Muslim or not.

We think we cannot help non Muslims, but that is very incorrect

Muhammad (saw) said: Let he who believes in Allah and the Last Day care for his neighbors

Speaker: Yousef Elyaman

We are supposed to invite all through wisdom and beautiful preaching: we aren’t doing our job 

Dawah efforts:

Love the person, but hate the action

Show them the truth in your religion and they will find faults in their religion

Infidel is a Catholic word

Kafir is a person who is a believer, but rejects the truth

People are asking the same questions over and over about Islam, but we are not getting better at responding to them

4:00pm – 5:30 pm Closing Session: Progressing Towards an Ideal Community

Speaker: Hossam Al Jabri

Muslim institutions compared to other minorities are very premature

We have an opportunity now that Islam is front AND center: everyone wants to know about it

America is still trying to make up its mind about Islam, whereas Europe has already decided how they want to

We cannot isolate ourselves from society no matter how hard we try

We can and need to preserve our identity without taking the rights of others in order to inform them about Islam

We have to realize that America is our country

Muslims need to love America just as much as Prophet Muhammad (saw) loved Mecca from an Islamic perspective

An ideal community is the Medina model: Muhammad (saw) established the masjid as the center of the community and so the love of the mosque needs to be brought back to the community

The underlying point of hijra from Mecca to Medina was to worship freely: Americans have this, but are we doing so? Are we doing this right?

An ideal community is brotherhood

Speaker: Hadia Mubarak

emphasized that both genders have the responsibility to keep everyone in check

we need to evaluate the role of women in Islamic spaces

barriers in mosque are not traditional or Islamic

Speaker: Ayman Hammous

There are two types of fiqh

1. Fiqh al Jadid: New Fiqh فِق الجديد

2. Fiqh Al Qadeem: Old Fiqh فِق القديم

- We need fiqh that is relevant to the Muslim community

- We need sisters who can reach the point of writing fatawa

We hope that you found these notes beneficial. Next year we encourage you all to attend. It was really an amazing experience.

Sincerely,

Sarah and the MAS Media Team

The links:

Introduction to 3rd Annual MAS Conference